Strong Relationships

Do you remember what life was like when you first fell in love?  How did you treat each other before the stresses of life tried to take over every aspect of your relationship?  When did everything become so complicated?

Think back to the beginning.  Really think about it.  Were the stresses of life really not there or were they just different?   If you are truthful with yourself, you will realize that the stress was there and life happened, but you were so excited about this new relationship that your focus was different.

That doesn’t have to change completely just because you have a family or a new job or whatever other priorities you have in your life.  Do not put your relationship so far down on your list that you forget to nurture it. 

Think of your relationship like a garden.  You are so excited to grow your own food.  You make a plan, buy the seeds, prepare the soil, plant your garden, and water it daily.  The little shoots pop out of the ground and you are so excited to see what will come next.

For the first few weeks you weed and water that garden with the excitement of a child at Christmas.  The next thing you know, you have a whole week of rain.  Well, you can’t really go out into the garden and pick the weeds and it doesn’t need to be watered, so you find something else to occupy your time.

The following week you find that you have other commitments that you need to do because you couldn’t complete them with all the rain.  So, once again, the weeding isn’t done and your garden is forgotten. 

Before you know it, your neighbors’ gardens are producing luscious vegetables and beautiful flowers.  You go out to your garden and realize that it has been weeks since you watered or weeded your garden.  One withering tomato plant stands alone among all of the brown vegetation where your garden used to be.  You can save this poor plant.  You just need to put in the work to bring it back to life.

Your relationship needs to be cared for just like your garden.  If you allow other aspects of your life to take over, your relationship will wither.  Nurture your relationship.  Go on dates, treat your partner with respect, have conversations about things that don’t include work and family, and rediscover the amazing partnership you had at the beginning. 

Remember that even the withering tomato plant can be saved.It just takes a little more love, time, and effort.